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Saturday, July 31st 2004

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Plaza Band

A new band was playing in the plaza today. From where we were sitting we couldn't see them and, from the sound, I thought it was one of those automated mechanical organ type things that plays like a pianola. I sent Yuko to have a look and she reported back that it was a real band of school kids. They played very well in the sense that their timing was good and they didn't play any wrong notes. But the performance was somewhat lacking in feeling. This may be why I thought it sounded like a machine.

Chess Player

Then, as I was sitting in the sunny plaza and I was writing the blog entry for yesterday, a man approached me and said: "Hello Peter." It was [Name Omitted], a participant in the Pawel Rej Memorial Tournament (number 1). We had a brief conversation and reached agreement that XXXXX are bastards. He's working at XXXXXXX now.

Belinda

Belinda had something dangling from her nose on the left side.

As it looked like an electrical thingy, and it was near the blinker that doesn't work, I thought it might be the cause of the problem.

So I lay on the ground and tried to see where the dangling thing was supposed to go. Being unsuccessful, I decided to look at the right side as an example of what it should look like. The right side looked quite clear. I could see a thingy that looked exactly like the dangling thingy and it was plugged into the back of the blinker!

The right side.

But when I returned to the side with the dangling thingy there was a lot more "stuff" in the cavity. So much that I could not see the blinker at all! I eventually determined that the blinker on the left side has a thingy plugged into it, as it should. So the dangling thingy did not come from there. I then noticed a yellow metal thingy with a hole in it. Perhaps this was a chassis grounding point. So I plugged the dangling thingy into it.

The left side.

This did not fix the blinker problem, but at least the thingy is not dangling anymore.

Thus ends my adventure in motor maintenance.

Italian Cow and Chicken

We went to dinner at Keiko and Edwin's place.

We had to participate in the cooking process. Yuko had to operate the pasta machine and I assisted with making the little pasta pocket thingies.

The main course was cow, with chicken on the side. It was quite different from the stereotype of Italian food we are used to. There was no cheese to be seen!

Because most of the dinner conversation was about arses and nakedness, Edwin had to cover Keiko's ears for much of the time.

Then, out of the blue, Keiko and Edwin sang Happy Birthday and gave Yuko a present (even though her birthday is not until September).

Home-made place-mats.

It later emerged that Keiko thought Yuko's birthday was in August. The present has therefore be re-designated as a "leaving the company" present.

End of Month

And thus, another eventful month in the lives of the Noswonkys, ends.

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Friday, July 30th 2004

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Sleepless in Riverview

Yuko had a dream in which she did something which disrupted the electricity supply of the whole area. Because of this she was unable to sleep most of the night. At 6.30 am I woke up and could hear her tapping away on the computer keyboard.

Buskers Return

As the solstice recedes into the past, the sun gets higher every day, and the conditions for busking, and for listening to busking improve. Today the buskers returned to Lane Cove and played their Dixieland ditties for our entertainment. Of course we didn't contribute any money.

Buskers in the Plaza

Badminton

Eight players today: [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], and me. I continued my "wristy" style of play and it seemed to work. My standard of play was adequate.

Just as I was warming up, and before the others arrived, I got a phone call from XXX XXX XXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX He said that XXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XX XXXXXXXXX XXX XX XXX XXX XXXX XX XX XXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXX XXXX XX XX XXXXXXX XX XXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXX XXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXX XX XXXX XXXXX XX XX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX XX XXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XX XXXXXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXXX XXXXXX I will have to call McGurkin abut this!

GreenMan also told me that XXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XX X XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXX XXXX XXXXX XXX X XXX XXXXX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXX X XXXXX So it's probably good that thing worked out the way they did.

Sushi

Yuko made sushi...

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Thursday, July 29th 2004

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The Count

Another hit today...

  • The "simple" hit count is 2/2 (hit rate = 100%).

Unfortunately, today's hit turned out to be a duplicate. But still, you can't beat 100%!

Korean

We invited Mother to the Korean BBQ. Then we decided not to go to the Korean BBQ.

Then we decided to go to...

Thai

We took Mother to Colours of Thai at Mosman.

We ate Crying Tiger, and various Chicken and Prawn dishes.

Crying Tiger. I thought it was an endangered species. Now it's more endangered.

Noswonky and Mother Wonky.

Dorothy Noswonky

When we went home, Yuko cooked sugary apples...

And Mother studied CGI programming, while I made her a laté.

Then, in a fit of rage at the quirks of CGI, Mother threw down her laté, soaking the table cover in hot coffee. We had to soak it in the bath.

And... I had to make another laté!

After that, no further action was required.

From Message
MSD
1/08/2004
5685 Days Ago
I find it amusing that you went to all that trouble to type an accented 'e', but then misspelt latté!

So, maybe further action is required after all.

From Message
Webslave
1/08/2004
5685 Days Ago
You are mistaken. As I mentioned earlier, no further action is required.

Note: To save typing in future, I will use the abbreviated form: "NoFAIR".

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2/02/2008
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Wednesday, July 28th 2004

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Another Uncle Dead

My aunt Shirl, (my father's brother's widow) who, at 80, is the acknowledged matriarch of the Nosworthy family, went to hospital recently because of a problem with her pacemaker. She was surprised when her husband Alex didn't visit her. When one of her friends went to investigate they found him lying dead on the floor of their house. Mother told me about it when I took the printed photos to her this afternoon.

I didn't know Alex very well as they had lived in Cowra for about the last 30 years. We stayed with them at their hobby-farm in Cowra a couple of times when I was a kid. That's where I had my first cow-milking and speed-boat-riding experiences. I can't find the picture of me in the boat, but I found this...

Early Noswonky with cow.

Since then I've only seen them a couple of times, the last being at the great Nosworthy family reunion in Canberra in 1998.

Raincoat

Yuko gave Helmut an umbrella to replace the one he lent her a few days ago. She then bought a raincoat to go with the Helmut umbrella.

Ten Dollar Raincoat

The Italian Bird

Keiko has ordered an Italian bird killed for our dining pleasure on Saturday evening. Although it has been designated as Italian, I'm not sure if this refers to it's place of hatching, it's place of death or it's manner of being cooked.

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Tuesday, July 27th 2004

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Finger Counting

Yuko was counting how many dictionaries she has (which is a significant number), and I noticed she has an unusual method of counting on her fingers. She said this is a standard method familiar to all Japanese people. One hand is used to count from 0 to 10. I've always needed two hands to count that far!

Chubby (adj.)

After seeing a picture in the SMH depicting a Miss Chubby contest in Italy, we discussed the etymology of the word chubby. Yuko's electronic dictionary told us that it derives from the chub fish which I had never heard of.

"I can't imagine a person who hasn't a dictionary any time."
- Y. Noswonky

"I can imagine them."
- P. Noswonky

TV

Epitome has a new plasma TV with and X-Box. We haven't seen it operating yet. This may be to attract customers during the Olympics.

Korean Cars

Yuko thinks Hyundai's car designs are not entirely original. She cites this evidence...

School Trip

In the afternoon, I was seconded to act as driver for a school trip (ie: a trip to a school) for Yuko and XX XXXXXXXXX We picked him up St. Leonards at about 3pm and then went to the Japanese School at Terrey Hills.

While they had their business meeting I went to a cafe at the local shops and had coffee and toast.

Mother

Mother has been hassling me for a while, to print some photos for of her paintings for her. I finally got around to it today. She will be shocked when she finds out!

From Message
Laughing Mole
28/07/2004
5689 Days Ago
Finger counting

Cool!

(If I were a little more dexterous, I could count up to 31 using just one sinister paw.)

From Message
Webslave
28/07/2004
5689 Days Ago
Mr Mole,
I'd like to see that!
I assume that if you used both sinister paws you could count up to 1023. But why not use your regular paws too?

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2/02/2008
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Monday, July 26th 2004

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The Sleep-in

We didn't wake up until 10am. As Yuko had to leave for a dentist's appointment at 11am, there was no time to have breakfast. So instead, I drove Yuko to St. Leonards and dropped her. Then I had free time until 2pm. So I travelled to a secret location and did secret things until Yuko called me ask to be picked up.

Simple

In the afternoon I tried the simple XXXXXX for the first time. XXXX XX XXX XXX XXXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXX XX XXXX XX XXXXXX X XXXXXXX XXX XXX XXXX XXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX

X XXX X XXXXX XXXXXXXX XX XXX XX XXXX XX XXXXX XXXX XXXX X X XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXX XXXXX XXXX XX X XXXXXX XX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXX XX XXX XX XXXXXXXX XX XXXXX X XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXX X XXXXX XXXXXXX XXXXX XX XX XX XXXX XXXX XX XXX XXXXX For this reason, I was unable to do any more work on the PHP photo viewer which remains at the two-day stage. X XXXX XXX X XXXXXXX XXXX XX XX XXX XXXXXXX X XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXX XXX XXX XXXX XX XXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXXX XXXX XX XX XXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX

I am starting a new count:

  • The "simple" sample count is 2.
  • The "simple" hit count is 1 (hit rate = 50%).

Note: The statistical sample is too small to draw any conclusions yet.

I am hoping for a high hit rate, depite the fact that this will confirm the flaws and failings of a significant segment of the human race which I have long suspected.

Pictures

I didn't take any pictures today!

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26/07/2008
4230 Days Ago
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Sunday, July 25th 2004

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Questioning Method

I wanted to print something, and I was aware that Yuko had had a problem with the printer last night, so I said to Yuko:

"Does the printer work?"

However, this question made her very agitated and scared. She said that I had asked the question "too suddenly". She later instructed me in the preferred method of asking such a question. It should be something like this...

"Yuko, I love you. By the way... last night you used the printer didn't you? Did you have any problem with it... is it ok now? Thank you very much for your assistance."

In future, I will know that I must frame all questions in this manner.

Tokyo Mart

I drove Yuko to Tokyo Mart to put an advertisement on the board. It was very exciting.

Then, as Belinda was hungry, we stopped at the service station. One tyre looked a bit low, so I added some air to it. However, Belinda was filthy!

Yuko used the windscreen cleaning thingy to clean Belinda's body. I think this may be illegal, or at least immoral...

Viewer

I did some more work on the photo viewer. The day 2 version is now fairly usable. One more day should be enough to finish it off.

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2/02/2008
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Saturday, July 24th 2004

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Olio Debacle

Yuko suggested we go to Olio for breakfast. So we did. But it was a debacle, because when we got there, it was closed.

Yuko was sad about that...

So then we had to return to Epitome and not mention our disloyalty. When we were leaving Epitome, it was raining and Helmut noticed that we didn't have an umbrella. So he gave us one! I'll bet they wouldn't have done that at Olio. Yuko wants to keep the umbrella because she likes the way it pops open. She will offer to give Helmut a different one in return. Helmut probably didn't realise he was feeding an umbrella addiction.

Ignatian Studios

This is the gate to the College just across the road from our house. The "Ignatian Studios" sign went up some time yesterday. We are curious about what it means. I might have something to do with the soccer and rugby games scheduled for today. We got a letter from the Prefects about it apologising for any inconvenience the games might cause the residents. The letter offered us a free sausage or steak sandwich from the BBQ on the day of the game (today). I guess this is a bribe to ensure that we don't complain to the police about having several thousand football hooligans converging on our otherwise peaceful suburb.

I was considering claiming my sandwich, but as it was raining all afternoon, I decided not to venture over to the BBQ. The rain also reduced the numbers of hooligans to a tolerable level.

New Viewer

XXXXXX XXXXXXX XXX XX XXXXXXXXX X XXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX XXX XX XXX XXXXXXXXXX So today I decided to re-write my web-based photo viewer as it was in need of an overhaul anyway. By evening I had a functioning (although feature-poor) photo album viewer. I was quite surprised at how quickly I was able to get it working.

From Message
MSD
27/07/2004
5690 Days Ago
At the end of "Umbrella Story part 1", you should add a link to part 2. I followed the link to part 1, because I wanted to have another look at your photoshoped picture of the umbrellas on the field, but I almost couldn't be bothered, because the link wasn't quite handy enough.

From Message
Webslave
27/07/2004
5690 Days Ago
Are you suggesting the umbrella image is faked???

PS: I have added the link you suggested.

From Message
MSD
27/07/2004
5690 Days Ago
Are you suggesting the umbrella image isn't faked??? PS: I have clicked on the link you added

From Message
Webslave
28/07/2004
5690 Days Ago
I deny using Photoshop to produce that image.

PS: I confirm that you clicked the link I added at 23:23:16.

From Message
who cares
28/07/2004
5689 Days Ago
But you don't deny that the image is faked, do you?

From Message
Webslave
28/07/2004
5689 Days Ago
A thorough investigation of all aspects of this matter has been undertaken. Noswonky management has carefully considered the available documentation and any responses from the appropriate individuals which were made during the investigation. As a result of this process, Noswonky has concluded that no further action is required.

From Message
who cares
29/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
Couldn'tou just conclude with one simply sentence "Yes, it's faked, but we don't want to tell"? You did learn your lesson from CISRA by using simpliar phrase.

From Message
Webslave
29/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
I refer you to my previous answer: "No further action is required."

From Message
MSD
29/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
Are you suggesting there is no further action required?

From Message
Webslave
29/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
No, I'm not suggesting anything. I'm simply stating the fact that no further action is required.

From Message
MSD
29/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
Are you suggesting that what you're saying are facts?

From Message
Webslave
30/07/2004
5688 Days Ago
It is a fact that it was decided that no further action is required. Therefore, no further action is required.

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26/07/2008
4230 Days Ago
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Friday, July 23rd 2004

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Liquid Butter

We went to Olio instead of Epitome because Yuko had to catch a train to the City at 10.30am. Last time we went there I had a problem. When I opened the butter thingy, it was just liquid and it spilled all over me. It was because they had put the butter thingy on the warm toast causing the butter to melt. I told them not to do it that way in future. However, today they did it again...

Butter thingy rests on warm toast.

Fortunately, this time it was only slightly melted.

Butter partly melted.

Badminton

Nine players today, and there was another CISRA group on the third court! I've been intentionally using my wrist a lot more, particularly when smashing. I do this because otherwise my elbow hurts after I play. The more wristy style seems to ease the stress on the elbow. It seems I can hit the shuttle faster too!

"Green Man" spoke to me about my green conversion. I hope he doesn't read the next item.

Ponto-Cho

Mother took us out to Ponto-Cho. Yuko and Mother both wore fur cut from the bodies of innocent animals slain to satisfy the greed of capitalist pigs.

At the restaurant, Yuko asked me if I wanted beer in a "jug" as she pointed to the item in the menu which said "330ml". I agreed, expecting a glass of moderate size. Instead we got glasses of greater than moderate size.

Mother couldn't believe it and kept nagging me to "not drink all of it" as if I was unaware of the effects of alcohol on driving ability.

I didn't drink it all, but Yuko had no such qualms and became intoxicated.

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Thursday, July 22nd 2004

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Amazon

Yuko ordered some stuff on the Web from Amazon.co.jp on Friday. Amazingly, yesterday we received notification that it had arrived. So this morning we went to pick it up at DHL in the back-streets of Artarmon. I had to double park while Yuko went in...

She was very happy to get the package and very impressed that it got here from Japan so quickly. I think it was books.

New Language

XXXXX X XXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXX X XXXXXXXX XX XX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXX X XXXXX XXXXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XX XXXXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXX XXX

Grinder

Yuko found a tea (not coffee) grinder stashed away somewhere. It's one that she brought from Japan a long time ago.

At first it didn't work so she asked me to try to fix it. After I tried to fixed it it still didn't work. Then Yuko jiggled it a bit and it started working. It grinds the tea leaves into a fine powder. She's said she'll give it to Keiko.

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26/07/2008
4230 Days Ago
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Wednesday, July 21st 2004

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Political Statement

I saw a political statement on a car at Lane Cove. This is certainly not in keeping with the blue-ribbon status of this electorate.

Did the taxpayers pay for this political statement?

Banned For Life

XXX XX XXX XXXXXX XXXXXXXX XX XXXXX XX X XXXX XXXX XX X XXXXXXX XXX XX XXX XXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXX XXXX XX XXXXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXX X XXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XX XXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XX XXXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XX XXXX XXXXXX This leaves me bitter, twisted and seething with rage and resentment.

Spider-Man 2

Now that the school holidays are over, we felt it was safe to venture to a movie theatre with Mother. It was good timing - there were only five people in the theatre including the three of us.

It's the story of a pizza delivery boy who can't deliver the pizzas quickly enough to get paid. So he makes extra money by taking photographs of himself wearing a kinky red and blue costume. He considers giving it up but then decides to dump his girlfriend because he prefers wearing the kinky suit.

We liked the movie. Mother asked me if it was a true story. Of course I told her that the names of some of the people were changed.

Movie-goers

Orpheum

The Pig Man

Then Mother bought us coffee and french toast at Waters Lane. The "Pig Man" was there! He's a guy we've seen at Waters Lane many times who looks like a pig, which is why we call him the Pig Man. Sometimes we've seen him touching the female staff. We therefore think he might be the owner of the place, or at least a shareholder.

Waters Lane

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26/07/2008
4230 Days Ago
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Tuesday, July 20th 2004

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Moon

I was reminded by today's TV news that today is the 35th anniversary of the Moon landing (although technically the anniversary is tomorrow in Sydney's time zone), and as I didn't do much today, I thought I'd write about what I was doing 15 years ago.

On or about the 20th anniversary of the Moon landing I met and got the autograph of the dude famed for being the first man to urinate on the Moon...

Buzz Aldrin - Premier Lunar Urinator

And I listened to a speech by the then President (I think his name was Bush) while snipers on the backs of utes pointed rifles at me...

Bush (yes he is actually visible)

His speech was supposed to be some profound Kennedyesque thing about going to Mars within 50 years. But everybody forgot about it after that. Actually Dan Quayle also made a speech, but everybody forgot about him too (except for his prowess in spelling the names of vegetables).

And I listened to speeches by three dudes who claimed to have been to the Moon.

Buzz "I should have been first" Aldrin, Neil "Good luck Mr. Gorsky" Armstrong and Michael "If you guys can't get it up I'm going home alone" Collins

They even showed us the film set where they faked it all...

The Moon according to NASA.

Meanwhile... back in 2004...

Yuko forced me to wear her glasses, making me look ridiculous.

Yuko's glasses

We went to the Crows Nest Centre again because Yuko wanted to book the room for use in her new endeavour.

The Chadwick Room

And in the evening I heard someone rummaging around in the garage. It turned out to be someone wearing very odd slippers...

And Yuko asked me to change the picture on the Noswonky Home Page as it has been unchanged for quite a long time.

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Monday, July 19th 2004

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Plaza

After mutilating the gazebo last month,

today they were ripping up the grass too. It looks like the council has a budget surplus they have to spend as quickly as possible.

Meanwhile, Yuko warmed herself in the arcade.

TLCC

I probably neglected to mention that Yuko resigned from TLCC/Aspect last week. She had been planning it for such a long time that it seemed like just a formality and I therefore neglected to mention it. So I guess we're both unemployed now!

Anyway, today I drove her over there so she could pick up some boxes containing her personal teaching materials. I drove round and round while she went in and brought the boxes out. She and Etsuko then threw them into the back of the car willy-nilly (as I was stopped in a no-stopping zone).

Green

I've become a greeny by buying green bags to use for shopping.

Down with plastic!

Ironing Alternative II

Yuko "ironed" some more items by sticking them to the window. However, she conceded that it would be easier to just iron them!

From Message
GreenMan
20/07/2004
5697 Days Ago
What took you so long to become a greenie???

From Message
Webslave
20/07/2004
5697 Days Ago
Probably because I'm a bastard.

PS: Is it "greeny" or "greenie"?

From Message
GreenMan
20/07/2004
5697 Days Ago
I think it's greenie, BTW I found a greenie blog:
http://users.tpg.com.au/jonjayra/green.html
At any rate I must congratulate you on your decision to ditch a plastic bag! Better late than never.

From Message
Green Webslave
20/07/2004
5697 Days Ago

Thanks you for the URL. I've converted it into a link and, to demostrate my greenness, I've added it to my list of Other Blogs.

From Message
Laughing Mole
20/07/2004
5697 Days Ago
Hello Webmaster, er, slave,

Thank you for your "welcome back Mr Mole" comment posted a few days ago.

I did indeed go away on holiday. However I am most troubled to hear that the imposter also apparently went on holiday at the same time. Due to some information that has come to light, I am sorry to say I do not think this was a coincidence - I now suspect that the imposter is stalking me.

When I looked through my holiday happy snaps, I discovered what appears to be the imposter lurking in the corner of one of them. I've clipped out this part and mailed it to you so you can see the evidence with your own eyes.

I may have to go underground for a while...

PS: Have you taught the imposter a chess lesson yet?

From Message
Webslave
21/07/2004
5697 Days Ago
Hello Mr. Mole,
The stalker bears a remarkable resemblance to you...

I note however, that the imposter goes naked while you prefer clothes. Despite this difference in fashion sense, have you considered the possibility that you are stalking yourself without realising it? The chess lesson is still in progress.

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Sunday, July 18th 2004

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Hooded Girl

It was quite cold today, and so Yuko took on the appearance of a fairy-tale character made famous for an incident involving the inhumane slaughter of an innocent animal.

Little Tartan Riding Hood

XXXX

X XXX XXX XXXX XX XXX XXXXXXX XXXX XX XXX XXXXX XXXX XX XXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXX X XXX XXXXXXX XXX XXXXX XXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXX XX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXX XX XXXX XX X XXXXXXXXX XXX XX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXX XX XX XXX XXXXX XXXX XX XX XXXXX XXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX X XXXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXX XXXX XX XXXX XXXX XXXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XX XXX XXXXXXX XX XXXXX XXXXXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX X XXX XX XX XXXXX XXX XX XXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX

X XXXX XXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXX XX XXX XXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX X XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXX X XX XXX XXXXXX XX XXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXX XX XXX

Root of The Lily

Yuko made some Lily-Root Chips today. They are just like potato chips, with a similar taste, but they look much more interesting.

Lily Root Chips

Oiling the Pedal

Inspired by the spectacular display of musical instrument maintenance performed yesterday by the writer of another blog, I decided to do some myself. My sustain pedal has been squeaking, so I oiled it.

Applying Oil

After that it still squeaks, but not as much.

I've been practising the first 13 bars of Raindrop for a while now, and I've been too scared (or lazy) to go any further. But the success of my maintenance project and the new reduced-squeak pedal inspired me to go ahead and learn another bar, the 14th...

Bar 14

Of course it will take some time to master.

From Message
business analyst
19/07/2004
5698 Days Ago
There's a business opportunity - "Noswonky's Lily Root Chips!"

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Saturday, July 17th 2004

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Fountain Pen

At Epitome, Yuko practised signing her name with a fountain pen. She likes fountain pens. They have white paper "table cloths" on the tables and the children at the next table were busy drawing pictures on them and colouring in. So I told Yuko she should sign her name on the "table cloth". However she was too shy and used her own paper instead.

Computing

I had intended to do some more work on XXX XXX XXXX but I ended up doing nothing on it. Instead I spent a lot of time in the evening sifting through the old blog files which have been off-line for a while, preparing them to be put back on-line.

Fried Tofu

We had a small dinner, which will contribute to us not becoming fat pigs.

Fried Tofu

Welcome Back Mole

Welcome back to Mr. Mole, who has apparently been away on holiday and is now apparently back. It's a remarkable coincidence that the imposter went on holiday at the same time.

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Friday, July 16th 2004

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Honey Bees Can't Swim!

I have long held the opinion that honey bees can't swim. However, I had never seen this proposition tested until today at Epitome. A bee buzzed (as bees do) around us for a while and then decided to take a swim in my coffee...

The bee's swimming ability will give Ian Thorpe nothing to worry about. I took the cup it inside to ask for another coffee and the staff all gathered around to have a look. It caused much hilarity and amusement. I got a replacement coffee at no charge.

Later, another bee showed further interest in Yuko's coffee, but no more swimming was attempted.

Yuko was also happy to find some money on the ground.

Badminton

Another high attendance today with eight players. I think I played six games, and I lost every one! Despite this, I felt I was hitting and running well.

Gambling

Yesterday Yuko bet me $2.00 that XXXXXXX XXXXXXXX would not contact me by the end of the day despite having said they'd contact me "early this week". I lost that bet. Then today, I foolishly accepted a repeat bet that they would not contact me by the end of today. Well, I'm writing this at 6pm and the security of my $2.00 is looking shaky.

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Thursday, July 15th 2004

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Ironing Alternative

Yuko has an alternative to ironing handkerchiefs. She Sticks them to the window while they're wet and they dry flat. It works quite well.

Korean BBQ Again

We went to the Korean BBQ at Eastwood with Mother.

Mother asked for a fork, and the waitress asked me if I needed a for too. However, she didn't ask Yuko. She made the assumption that, because I'm not Asian, I can't use chopsticks! She was obviously racist. She should have realised that Mother can't use chopsticks because of her missing finger...

Black Rice

Mother's hairdresser, who is Chinese, recommended Black Sticky Rice to her. So she tried to buy some at the Asian food shop at Eastwood when we came out of the Korean restaurant. She succeeded.

Blues Mother

We also gave Mother the pair of sunglasses I found on the road one day at UTS.

The Blues Mother.

Apple

When we got home, Yuko cooked sugary apples in the oven. However, I eschewed them.

DOD

Welcome back to the reader from the Department of Defence. Am I under investigation???

From Message
Chopstick Expert
23/07/2004
5694 Days Ago
I'm sorry to see that your monther has lost part of her finger. However I just tried and I was able to use chop sticks quite sucessfully (ie. I was able to eat) while simulating the loss of a forefinger. I encourage your mother to persist in the use of chopsticks and she will experience the delight of using chopsticks that has given joy and food to over a billion Chinese, Japanese and other assorted Asian types. If she would like a personal lesson, please do not hesitate to ask. It will only cost you one meal at the Korean BBQ so I can properly demonstrate the use of 3 fingered chopsticks.

From Message
Webslave
23/07/2004
5694 Days Ago
Chopstick Expert,
Thank you for your kind offer. I will pass it on to Mother. However, I should warn you that, as she was unable to use chopsticks even when she had a full set of fingers, I think you may be up against a formidable challenge.

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Wednesday, July 14th 2004

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Pregnancy

We've suspected for a while that Patricia might be pregnant. Today she mentioned that she'll be going on holiday for a while and when Yuko asked her about it, she told us that she has a baby due in November. Congratulations Patricia! Yuko and Patrica exchanged email addresses and phone numbers before we left.

The recent solstice has meant that the Sun has been too low in the sky for us to sit outside in the plaza. Today we determined that the sun was now high enough and the tree leafless enough to return to the sunny table.

The Sun peeps over the top of the building and through the bare tree.

Yuko has become very specific in her breakfast requirements. Today she ordered toast and specified that it be sliced exactly 7mm thick. They got pretty close to specification...

TT

We went to NSLC to play TT. When we arrived the room was in use by the Racquet-ball players. We got [Name Omitted] to tell them to finish their game, which they did.

We played for about 90 minutes. The players were (in alphabetical order): [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted], [Name Omitted] and [Name Omitted].

Some exciting and humiliating games were played. Yuko was playing well and I was playing badly, although I think I played well in one game.

At one point, a great feat of ball recovery was performed by [Name Omitted].

The ball is recovered.

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Tuesday, July 13th 2004

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Olio

Yuko had to catch a train at 11am to go to the city, so we had breakfast at Olio at St. Leonards again. A group of three guys sat at a table nearby and I thought I recognised one of them. He looked like one of the guys I met last week at XXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX However, as I had only met him once, I wasn't sure. Naturally, I tried to eavesdrop on their conversation hoping for a clue to whether he was the same guy. But although I could hear a lot of their conversation, I didn't catch anything specific enough to resolve the question.

I stayed at the cafe a bit longer after Yuko left and decided to use Fifi to check for wireless networks in the area. I found one which seemed to have no security so I tried to connect to it. Although it seemed to allow me to connect, I couldn't see anything. Of course, this may just be due to my lack of hacking experience.

Mac

While Yuko was in the city I went to Borders at Macquarie Centre. I bought a book on XXX which may be useful.

Dictionaries

Yuko bought another electronic dictionary at a second-hand shop.

The new second-hand dictionary. It has two English dictionaries including the Concise Oxford.

As it's better than the one she's been using, she decided to give me her old one to replace the one I've been using, which in turn replaced the one that I was using before it was stolen in the robbery.

My old and new dictionaries.

Yuko spent the rest of the evening playing with them.

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Monday, July 12th 2004

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Art

We dropped in to Mother's place to return her art. Mother also got to see Yuko's new hairstyle for the first time...

Crows Nest

After breakfast I drove Yuko to Crows Nest so she could have a 30min meeting with [Name Omitted], her financial adviser. I went and browsed the shops while she had the meeting which lasted about 1.5 hours. I also found a place that might be a suitable venue for XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX It's the Crows Nest Centre. So when Yuko finished her meeting we went in and spoke with one of the staff who showed us the available rooms and gave Yuko the info about hiring.

Chinese

Yuko cooked sweet and sour chicken, which proves that she can cook Chinese in addition to Japanese. This is obviously a valuable skill and Yuko claims that it exceeds the capabilities of most Chinese women.

Drug Trafficker

The guy we saw carrying the Olympic flame on June 4th has been in the news a lot today.

Sean Eadie carries the flame at Lane Cove on June 4th 2004

He's been accused of trafficking banned substances. I thought he looked a bit dodgey at the time.

Shoulder Socks

Yuko ridiculed me for wearing my socks on my shoulder while leaving my feet naked...

I don't see anything unusual about it!

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Sunday, July 11th 2004

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More Rain

The rain is so unusual that it's worth mentioning. It rained.

Bent Hair

Yuko noticed that her hair was bent...

Bent

So she went to Oxford Street today to get it straightened. When she came home, sure enough her hair was straight... well, straighter than before.

Straight

When I told Mother that Yuko had her hair straightened she was shocked (for obvious reasons).

Breakup

Mother called today and told us the news that [Name Omitted] and [Name Omitted] have broken up! This is shocking news given the length of their time together and the nature of their relationship. I'm speechless! I am without speech!

Blog

I did some more changes to the blog. The main visible change is in the navigation links on the left. I re-wrote the code that generates the "tree" of links for navigating the years and months. It's now more in keeping with traditional tree navigation. But I suspect the change will go un-noticed by most readers.

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Saturday, July 10th 2004

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Rain

I think it rained a moderate amount during the night. It was still raining a bit in the morning and it continued sporadically throughout the day.

Mother's Pictures

Mother and Marie have been painting pictures, and yesterday Mother gave me some of her art to photograph. So today I photographed it.

Dark Fruit

Bright Fruit

The Beach

The Harbour

She also gave me an old picture of Bob which she wants me to copy and print. So I scanned it...

Bob

Apple

No, not that Apple... this apple...

Yuko has taken to cooking apples with sugar and blatantly eating them.

An apple eater hangs her head in shame prior to consuming her second for the evening.

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Friday, July 9th 2004

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Blog

I finally got the new blog layout to work, although I had to cheat a bit. There are still some problems with some previous entries which have wide bits, and of course there was the Mole Blog Hack in May. Anyway, it still needs some work, but I decided to install it.

The old blog is here for comparison.

Note from Webmaster (14/7/04):
Due to changes in the files which are used by both the old and the new blog layouts, the old blog no longer looks like it did when it was in use. In fact parts of it look quite strange.

Olio

Yuko had to go to the city in the morning, so we went to St. Leonards for breakfast so she could jump straight on the train afterwards. However, our favourite St. Leonards Cafe, Coffee Club has gone...

So we had to go to Olio instead...

Actually Olio is quite a nice place too.

Then Yuko left me and went to the city while I had another coffee. She said she'd be back around 3pm.

Badminton

We had nine people today, which may be a record. It's a good number because you can have two games of doubles going on while on person rests. Then when one game finishes the rester can rotate onto that court. This means that you never need to have one group waiting for the others to finish their game before mixing up the teams.

Towards the end of the session Yuko rang me to ask to be picked up. I got in some trouble because I had neglected to mention that I

Mother

I bought an automatic light for Mother the other day (because she liked ours) and I took it around to her place today and installed it. The installation process consisted of placing it on the floor against the skirting boards and holding it in place with some bultac.

She also gave me some of her paintings to photograph because she wants to make some prints to send to her brother. They may appear here too in a future posting.

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Thursday, July 8th 2004

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Rainbow Warrior

There is an old woman we often see walking around in Lane Cove. She's a bit of a local "character" who is known as the Rainbow Warrior. This is because of the way she dresses. It's not the normal attire you would expect to see on anyone, let alone a woman over 80!

Today, she looked particularly outrageous in a bright orange fur and pink hat adorned with flowers. Unfortunately I was too slow to get a picture from close up, but I tried again when she went by on the far side of the plaza...

XX

X XXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXXXXX XX XX XXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XX XXXX XX XXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XX X XXX X XXXXXXXXX

Head Cracking Mother

Mother was accessing the back of her car, when the rear hatch fell and cracked her head open. Blood gushed onto the ground and she stemmed the flow with some paper that was in the back of the car. She then went to the doctor to have it treated but there was no significant damage. I didn't hear about this incident until we picked her up in the evening to go to the Indian...

Indian

Mother had wanted to take us to see Spiderman 2*. However, because it appears to be a school holiday period now, I suggested that we wait until the ankle-biters are back at school where they belong. We decided to go to the Indian restaurant at North Sydney instead.

While we were there, it rained quite heavily for a short time. We sat near the window and had a view of Luna Park and the Bridge.

We ordered a curry entree, followed by curry and curry and rice.

We then had coffee at our place. When we got out of the car, the black bitches from the adjacent house were making some noise. I took this picture. You can see from their eyes that they are possessed by demons...

Mother forced me to play piano for her. Fortunately I had practised adequately and Mother didn't have to punish me.


* My spell-checker suggested replacing Spiderman with Superman.

From Message
Curry Man
9/07/2004
5708 Days Ago
You should have ordered curry with that.

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Wednesday, July 7th 2004

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Muffin

Yuko had another marathon lunch meeting with Keiko today. For this reason, she decided to only have a muffin for breakfast. Chubba was shocked by this decision!

Then, Yuko took the car, leaving me alone at Lane Cove. I therefore had to walk home. She took the camera with her, but as usual the resulting images are only of food.

The Cross

Meanwhile, I had to go to the Kings Cross area for XX XXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXX I parked near the police station and poured a handful of $2 coins into the meter. A bit later, as I stood on a street corner, I spotted a person I thought I recognised. However, due to the distance, and the fact that I was not wearing my glasses, I was unsure if it was he. The person I refer to is one whom I photographed in a compromising situation in the late 1980s. Unfortunately, despite my attempts to find that photograph in the late 1990s, I was unable to locate it. However, I have not given up!

XXX XXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXX XXXX XX X XXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXXX XX XXX XXXXXX X XXXXX XXXX X XXX XX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XX XXX X XXXXX XXX XXXXX XXXXXXX XXX X XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX X XXXX XXXX XX XXXX XXXXX XXX XX XXX XXX X XXX XXXXX XXXX XXXX XX XX XXXXXXXX

XXXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXX XX XXXXXXXX XX XXXXX XXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXX XXXXX XX XXXXX X XXXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX X XXXX XXXX XXXXXX XXXXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXX

Thus, the identity of the person I had spotted on the street earlier, was confirmed.

XXX XXXX XX X XXXX XX XX XXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX X XXX XXXX XX XX XXX XXXXXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX X XXXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XX XXXXX XX XX XX XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX XXX X XXXXX X XXXXX XXXXX XXX

When I came out, I was shocked to see it was raining! Unfortunately, by the time I got home it was a bit late to go to TT. So we piked and ate JFC.

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Tuesday, July 6th 2004

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Caught On Camera

An occasional reader emailed me some pictures, including the following, which for the first time shows the perspective of the bloggee...

Computing

X XXXXXXXXXX X XXXX X XXX XXXXXXXX XXXXX XX XXXXXXX XX X XXXXXXX XX X XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXX X XXXXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXXX X XXXX XXXXXXX XXX XXX XX XXX XXXXXX XX XX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX

I have run into another CSS problem with the new blog layout. It's really a browser compatability issue so I can just blame Bill Gates. Observant readers may have noticed that the Other Blogs heading over on the left side looks bigger than normal. That's a side effect changing the markup for the new layout.

Venue

Yuko's outing yesterday yielded some images of possible venues for XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX This one looks quite nice.

Springer

As we watched Jerry Springer...

Yuko cooked shiso leaf tempura...

And I helped eat them...

And two bitchy women faced off...

Why do we watch this crap???

Tax

I received my final payment summary from Canon today. It appears to be in error by $1.00. However, as the error favours me, I am laughing all the way to the bank. I just hope that that particular dollar is not one that I have to pay tax on.

I hope I will be entitled to a very large tax deduction this year, but that particular expense does not seem to be mentioned in Tax Pack. I guess I'll have to engage the services of a professional.

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Monday, July 5th 2004

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XXXX

X XXXXXXX XXX X XXXXXX XX XXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXXXX X XXX XXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XXX XXXXX XXX XX XXXXX XXX XXXXX XX X XXX XXXXXXXXX XXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXX XXX XXXXXXX XXX XXX XXXX X XXXX XXX XXXXXXX XX XX XXXXXX XXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXX X XXXXXXXX XX XX XXXXXXXX

XXXX X XXX XX XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XX XXXXXXXXX XXX X XXXXXX XX XXXXXX XXXXX XXX X XXX XXXX XX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXXXXX XX XXXX

XXXXXXX XXXXX

Yuko went out to look at possible venues for XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX She looked at the XXXXXXXXX XXX XXXXXX XXX XXXXX XXXX XXX XXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XX XXXX and she needs to get XXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX too.

Viruses

I've been getting a lot of emails today, and they're getting through my spam filter, that are of the form that suggests that an email I have sent has bounced. This sounds exactly like the new virus/worm thingy I read about in the paper today. They all have attachments too which is where the virus lives. Actually it's pretty obvious that these messages are fake because the alleged recipients shown are not addresses that I know. I haven't opened the attachments.

From Message
MSD
6/07/2004
5711 Days Ago
But of course, you wouldn't be affected by such things, not being a Windows/Internet Explorer/Outlook user, right?

I thought not.

From Message
Webslave
6/07/2004
5711 Days Ago
Right. Well... actually I do use Windows, but I give the Bill Clinton excuse:

"I've seen better, but it was already available right there in my office, so why not?"

From Message
MSD
6/07/2004
5711 Days Ago
Sounds like a good way to catch a disease to me. (Referring to both Bill, and yourself!)

From Message
Webslave
7/07/2004
5711 Days Ago
But, like Bill, I don't go all the way... I have never used Outlook.

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Sunday, July 4th 2004

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Picnic

Because it was quite warm, we decided to have a picnic at Tambourine Bay.

It was a simple picnic, based on a BBQ chicken, bread and rice, eliminating the need to cook on-site. We were hassled by a couple of dogs, and teenagers with balls, but other than that it was pleasant to relax on grass.

Blog

For the remainder of the afternoon I worked on a re-design of this blog using CSS. Here's a recursive sample of what it looks like so far...

Not much different is it!

Movie

Keiko recommended a movie which was on SBS tonight so Yuko insisted that we watch it. However, Keiko must have been mistaken because it wasn't on! So we watched Full Metal Jacket instead.

It's the story of a loser fat-arse who gets turned into a killing machine by the United States Government. He uses his newfound talent to avoid going to Vietnam where his friends have a whale of a time killing and maiming people while taking advantage of hencorm prices for prostitutes.

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Saturday, July 3rd 2004

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Garage Sale

In the morning, Yuko was so eager to go to a garage sale in our street that she left in the car without me before I was ready to leave and I had to walk there! I think she bought some stuff but I didn't look at it. I didn't buy anything this time.

Children

At Epitome a couple with three young children sat near us. The children were extremely noisy and repulsive. I blight on humanity! I am reminded of the joys of being childless, except for Andrew of course, who is no trouble at all.

Then, after breakfast we went to sus out Centre House because XXXX XX XXXXXXX XXX X XXXXX XXX XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX It looked a bit primitive, but it was closed so we couldn't look inside.

Meanwhile, Keiko went to XX XXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXXX XX XX XXXXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXX In this role she is acting as a spy for the benefit of Yuko and Keiko's scheme.

Mother

Later, Yuko and Mother went out together for the same reason. I didn't hear the result of this outing. I went for a 1.5 hour walk which is longer than normal.

Pixie

At about 2pm the domain transfer appeared to be taking affect, but it was intermittent, sometimes pointing to the old host and sometimes to the new. I guess it depends on the routing of the request and which hosts along the way have been updated and which have not. It now appears to be working consistently. I also managed to get my email re-routed correctly. I'm amazed that it all seems to work with so little hassle! I guess because Microsoft was not involved.

It appears MSD recorded the last hit to the old server. Congratulations MSD!

From Message
guess what
4/07/2004
5714 Days Ago
In the morning, I tried to post something, didn\'t work. Anyway, I was going to say \" ... ... ... ...\"

From Message
MSD
4/07/2004
5714 Days Ago
MSD stands for "MicroSoft Diagnostics"

From Message
Webslave
4/07/2004
5713 Days Ago
MSD,
Do you know anything about .htaccess and mod_rewrite, the Swiss Army Knife of URL manipulation?

From Message
MSD
5/07/2004
5713 Days Ago
Nope.

From Message
Webslave
5/07/2004
5713 Days Ago
Damn!

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4230 Days Ago
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Friday, July 2nd 2004

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Patricia

Patricia is reluctant to be photographed, but today Yuko managed to take a picture of her.

Badminton at UTS

Eight players again today so we booked two courts. There was also one new player, who is more renowned as a player of another sport and a frequenter of garage sales.

Although there were a few good points, I didn't feel that I played well today. In fact, I was on the losing side of two 11-0 games! In one of these I partnered the new player who, despite a height advantage, and a high ranking in that other sport, may have contributed to my humiliation.

As an aside...
Last night I taped the NBC Today Show to see what they would do with the Saddam story. I then watched it when I got home from badminton. The Saddam stuff was nothing special.

The more interesting bit was when they had two members of the U.S. Olympic Badminton team hitting out in the plaza. They hit with Matt, Katie and Al and then with each other. They were of a slightly higher standard than those who defeated me today.

Here's the video (2.9MB)...

Saddam

Speakin of Saddam, I added his blog to my list of other blogs, and added the links to the left side of this page for one-click access.

Vegetables

While I was at badminton Yuko went to Chatswood to photograph vegetables (as one does). But I won't distract readers with the resulting images.

XX

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Web Server

It's 10:30pm and I have just edited the DNS entries to transfer the noswonky domain to the Pixie server. If the URL in your browser shows noswonky.com, then it has taken effect. If it shows serverindo.net, it hasn't.

From Message
MSD
2/07/2004
5715 Days Ago
Patricia is reluctant to have her photo taken because she knows you're going to put it straight on the internet.

From Message
Laughing Mole
2/07/2004
5715 Days Ago
Saddam's blog? Bah! Why don't you link to an inspiring blog from a great wit?

From Message
Webslave
3/07/2004
5714 Days Ago
MSD,
If she knew that, she'd be even more reluctant.
Mr Mole,
Thank you for that recommendation. I added the link.

From Message
A Poster
26/07/2008
4230 Days Ago
Due to excessive comment spam, messages must await approval by the Webslave (Noswonky) before being displayed.

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Thursday, July 1st 2004

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Free Time

I had more free time today because Yuko went to the city to meet Keiko for another marathon meeting to discuss their cunning plans.

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When Yuko returned, she gave me the money from Keiko which is the payment for my translation work. I might have to open a Swiss bank account and move to a tax haven.

Sushi

We took Mother to Ponto-Cho and ate sushi.

Because Yuko's meeting took so long, I had to pick Mother up first and then go to the station to meet Yuko and then go directly to Ponto-Cho. As usual, we sat at the counter watching the sushi chef and it was very nice. We then returned to our house for coffee.

While we drank coffee we were waiting expectantly for the video of Saddam Hussein's court appearance to be shown on CNN. However, it was not shown until much later.

Web Server

I have decided to move the noswonky.com domain to the new server on Friday night. I believe it can take a while for the change to "propagate around the Internet", and as it will affect my email routing, I want to do it at a time when any loss of email will be least disruptive.

Month Anomaly

Yes, I know I'm posting a July entry in the June section, but it's my blog and I can post in any damned month I want!

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